Good news for those still aching for Umineko no naku koro ni merchandise though, the Note 05 DVD/Blu-ray is now coming out; sexy schoolgirl-whatever-the-fuck Beatrice-makura is what you’ll receive if you order the Gold Edition.

BELLYTRICEEEEEE

As well as a Maria plush (also a Beatrice one but I don’t have a picture of that), two Shannon figures, and best of all, me!

Eyes of a killer.

Happy figyu hunting!

You killed me, you bastards!

By double dose I mean there’s just the two of them on one pillow cover. Oh well!  If you’d like to order it, I got my Jessica dakimakura from Play-Asia, and they seem pretty solid; but it’ll cost you a hefty amount, around US$ 104, not counting shipping. If you have a coupon, use it!

Well, anyway, Episode 5 proved itself to be a slow, torturous and roundabout episode. The “First Twilight” and the subsequent closed room debates to place the blame on my mother for the crime ended up being discussed far longer than was necessary, although we got respite in the form of Battler showing up and kicking copious amounts of ass (at least once after getting his own handed to him). That being said, at the mock-trial, detective Furudo Erika’s constructed theory suffered more than a few holes poked in it, mostly in-game, but I believe (and this is probably not a new thing) I stumbled upon something that may just be the result of an error on the part of the writer himself.

Basically, we’re supposed to believe that, due to the cross-checking of alibis between the hours of 24:00 and 6:00 AM on October 5th, the only window of time in which the culprit could have committed the epitaph-like murders are within 24:00 and 1:00. The victims are located in the guesthouse, along with the (alive) servants Kumasawa and Gohda, as well as Doctor Nanjo, and Erika. But since everyone’s alibi has been checked, none of these suspects are guilty. In fact, the only person without an alibi is Natsuhi. If you’ve played the Episode through, you’ll know how that is supposed to turn out; however, some people might not have caught this tidbit.

But Rosa was one of the victims.

Rosa leaving at 1:00? But Rosa was a victim, and if Natsuhi is the culprit, the murders only could have taken place between the hours of 24:00 and 1:00. Are we supposed to believe that Rosa somehow manifested herself back in time to get killed by Natsuhi in the 2nd floor of the guesthouse? Wouldn’t it take several minutes just to walk there? So have I stumbled upon a mistake, a plot hole, or is this supposed to be interpreted as an intentional clue towards an alternative theory (besides the other one presented) about who is the culprit? The writing itself speaks in favor of it being intentional, but that would leave a gaping hole in Erika’s theory that neither Beatrice nor Battler caught.

Anyway, leave your thoughts in the comments!

Get it here, courtesy of the Witch Hunt!

The forum thread about this can be found here.

Does this mean we'll multiply? Oh my!

There’s not much to post about regarding Umineko, it seems – however it has come to my attention that Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni, in an official English translation, was listed for sale about a day or so ago. As the work that might as well have spawned Umineko, I present you with the link to purchase it if you so please:

Higurashi no naku koro ni at MangaGamer

Kya~

Holy hell, I’m smokin’ hot. And compared to the other side of the dakimakura it’s just plain drawn better. Something else; someone on pixiv (13408) drew a quick sketch of what the front would be like if it kept that image in mind. I’m not sure if I can actually upload the picture here since it’s semi-NSFW, but here is the link to the illustration on pixiv (although you’ll need to log in first). Awesome!

Halfway hair-boner, I'm almost a Super Saiyan!

Also coupled with is a dakimakura, which, I have to say is kind of weird, perspective wise. I know they tried to make it look like I was actually lying down or something, but it just ended up making my hips look engorged or something.

Just taken from the Umineko website. ENGORGED!

Right away you’ll see that this game is very fucking colorful.

Where the fuck...

It’s kind of charming in a way, although this particular scene is from the introduction, in which YOU ARE BEING CONQUERED BY THE DEMONS. It gets cuter soon, you’ll see, but anyway, like I said, they just kind of throw you into the game. I didn’t find the user interface at a glance particularly intuitive, as there’s certain things that it doesn’t track like the concept of “magic crystals” you can collect, or what the symbols mean on the mini-map, but I suppose that judgment isn’t fair because they’re all described on the pages in which they are relevant on. Magic crystals, for instance, are used to inscribe spells into your spell book from scrolls, or upgrade them, but you’re only really told this when you hover over the icon that tells you how many you have.

You click to move around the map, and there are various collectibles, units, or buildings you can move to and see what’s up. Items do things like raise your leadership (necessary to raise larger armies), give you runes (to spend on talent trees that buff you or your army), give you gold, units, or raise your stats. Units.. well, if you see them on the map, they’re almost ALWAYS hostile and will fight you, but you can also recruit friendly troops as well. Buildings sell items which your hero can equip, or you can hire units from them, or get quests. I found that there was a TON of shit happening on any given island, with collectibles lying around everywhere and units wandering aimlessly, and since enemy units can become aggressive and chase you down, it’s kind of daunting at first.

There's at least six things I can interact w-- OH MY GOD BEARS!!!

Since enemy units will sometimes chase you down, exploring can be a little difficult. In this case, I got jumped by a pack of bears.

Unfortunately for me, there are actually -four- bears.

I’m not sure how I can really describe the combat. If you played Heroes of Might and Magic, it’s like that. You have a kind of unit, and the number below it is how many you have of that. Each unit has individual stats – Attack and Defense, which determine if you do more or less damage to another unit, Initiative, which determines the turn order of units, Speed, which affects how far a unit can move on the battle grid, Damage, duh, Critical, which determines the chance at which they can deal 150% damage to an enemy, and Health, also duh. Units can also have special attributes that activate certain conditions; like Eyeless, which means a unit cannot be affected by “blinding” type spells, and can see invisible units at any time, or Cautious, in which the unit receives 30% more defense when they’ve lost 30% of their troop in a battle.

When it’s the turn of one of your units, you get Action Points to spend; these are used when you move, use skills, or attack. You can also occasionally (by that, I mean when your first unit that moved can move again, so on the next round) utilize your pet dragon and cast spells, which cost either Rage or Mana, the former which you gain by striking enemies in combat, and the other by waiting out of combat, although you can augment how you gain these both with your talents or items. Oh, by the way, spells and your dragon kick a ton of ass. Combat ends when your enemy’s units are defeated, but it’s game over when all your units are defeated (although you can run away before that sometimes, at the cost of your current army). You’ll then gain experience, which gives you levels, which gives you runes, which you spend on your hero’s talents. It’s not THAT complicated, but as I’m a beginner, I don’t really know if there’s advanced concepts to explore regarding this yet. There IS a tutorial in the beginning of the game that tells you what to do for combat, but.. What the fuck, why isn’t there one for any of the other stuff?

Anyway, at $40, this game is kinda pricey, but there is a demo out if you feel like bumming around for a bit to see if you like the pace of the game. The visuals are great, the storytelling (which I didn’t get into) is semi-serious but can also be lighthearted and fun on occasion, and the combat is pretty classic considering how old its predecessors were (not counting the other remake of King’s Bounty). Buy it here or try the demo here, and sorry if I didn’t catch something while trying to explain the game!

Bukuku~ or Ahaha~

Aside from my monster shoes, it looks fantastic.  Ordering is here if you can read Japanese and want to order it, or, you can check eBay for preorder sales from resellers.

Also awesome is:

Awesome

Sorry for the ugly pink text and bad colors, I had to rip the pictures directly off eBay, but that kind of cushion coupling is what I’ve been pushing since I learned about Umineko. As for ordering it, searching for Umineko stuff on eBay turned out to be easier than actually finding them, but these come out in June 2010 as well.